Las Vegas Raiders

Oakland Raiders: Jack Del Rio's Week 14 Pep Talk, Probably

Published Jun. 30, 2017 6:28 p.m. ET

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How would you get the Oakland Raiders ready for their Week 14 matchup against the Kansas City Chiefs? Where’s the bulletin board material?

You can feel the intensity among those involved or connected to the Thursday night matchup between the Oakland Raiders and Kansas City Chiefs. Coaches, players and fans who’ve immersed themselves in a storied rivalry have so many scenarios running through their minds.

What if we lose? How sweet would a win feel as we approach the playoffs?

The AFC West title won’t be decided on Thursday night, but the winner would control their own destiny for a potential first-round bye in the postseason. Due to the Raiders’ recent futility, a matchup between these rivals hasn’t meant this much since both teams scrapped for a division title in Week 16 of the 2011 season. In that year, the AFC West champion, Denver Broncos, finished 8-8. Oakland beat Kansas City but fell to 8-8 after a loss to the San Diego Chargers in the following week. The Chiefs finished 7-9.

Now, both teams sit atop the strongest division in the league. The New England Patriots share a 10-2 record with the Raiders and stand one game ahead of the 9-3 Chiefs.

Head coach Jack Del Rio has done a great job at keeping this team focused through a rough stretch. The Raiders will play their fourth game in 17 days on Thursday. He knows how to prepare his group regardless of the location or circumstance.

How does Del Rio fire up his guys? We can only imagine what’s said behind those walls before kickoff. But I bet it goes something like this:

Jack Del Rio Addresses His Team

Men, we’ve accomplished absolutely nothing so far. We’re not a playoff team yet. Our tickets haven’t been punched for January. The Chiefs have pushed us around for two years. Is that okay? Are you all fine with a school bully taking your lunch money? Because that’s exactly what happened in Week 6.

Big Dan Williams and Justin Ellis, we used to refer to you guys as Meat and Potatoes because you’re stout up front. When did you become Tofu and celery sticks? When you see Spencer Ware charging up the middle, ground him. Our trenches aren’t free admissions at a nightclub before midnight.

Michael Crabtree, as the stakes rise, you’re dropping passes. Is Richard Sherman correct in calling you mediocre in critical moments? I don’t believe him, but don’t prove him correct.

You’re the smoothest veteran on this roster. You’re King Crab for a reason. You’ve got the swag with the high-top fade and gold chain, but please, no Kenny Powers gestures tonight. We can’t afford unnecessary penalties.

So, you’re just going to give me the death stare Coop? No emotion, huh? Well, your former coach, Nick Saban, has a break before the College Football Playoff. He’ll be watching tonight. It’s been two years since you left the program, but no one wants to feel Saban’s wrath—not even coaches:

Mr. King, dancing punter extraordinaire, would you like a slot on Dancing with the Stars in the offseason? Well, they’re not calling up a punter in second-place in the AFC West. Field position will be important tonight. We need the booming kicks and another cool dance to add to your audition tape for D.W.T.S. Go out there and be you!

Sean Smith, Rodney Hudson, the Chiefs are the girlfriend who dumps you, then flaunts the upgrade in front of you as they walk by on the street. I need both of you to look in the mirror, put on your best outfits and add some glow to your game. Show them what they’ve been missing.

Carr, buddy, pinky swear with me right now that you’ll protect the football. Our offense is lightyears better than our rival, but we can’t even the playing field with turnovers. Please, take chances, we wouldn’t be here without your fearlessness, but use your head. In times of crisis, think, W.W.K.B.D—what would your idol Kobe Bryant do? Show everyone, for third time in the primetime slot, what an MVP looks like.

Guys, the Chiefs came into our house and took everything. They came into our home and raided the refrigerators. They chomped away at our defense and stripped us naked in front of our fans. Tonight, we take it all back. The NFL turned on the bright lights for this Thursday night game, and we’re going to march into Arrowhead Stadium and take it all back—and then some.

I’ll leave you with this, guys like FOX Sports analyst Michael Lombardi don’t give us enough respect. Watch him poo-poo our win over a tough Buffalo Bills team to praise the Chiefs, who he says is “for real” as if we’re a bunch of phonies.

Lombardi also says the Chiefs are a sleeping giant. Well, what’s a sleeping giant to a resurgent raging Raiders team?

We got this.

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