I love "The Office." I don't think that's any great secret. Yesterday marked the show's 10th anniversary -- the first episode of the American edition aired on March 24, 2005 -- and I felt like doing something.
Now, there are 192 episodes and while I've seen them all at least twice and would happily watch them all again, there just wasn't time for this now. So instead I watched the beginning of every episode, and graded each "cold open" (that little bit, usually unrelated to what follows, before the opening credits).
What does this have to do with baseball? Hey, one of the secondary characters is Ryan Howard! And there's more, which I'll reveal in a moment. Anyway, I assigned every cold open either an A, B, or C. Don't get me wrong, the C's are still really good. Mostly B's, but also so many A's that I had to go back and turn some of them into A+'s. And that's without including some extended cold opens. Especially the one where Michael has burned his foot on a George Foreman grill, and the one where Michael meets Deangelo in the hotel bar. Holy crap.
But I didn't count those, stuck instead with the "true" cold opens that can stand on their own. And there are approximately 168 of those.
So here are my 10 favorites. It would take me another day or two to rank them, so instead it's just chronological order...
Season 2, Episode 11 Jim takes everything from Dwight's desk -- including DWIGHT'S MIKE LIEBERTHAL BOBBLEHEAD -- and puts them in a vending machine.
Ep 3.02 Michael thinks he wants to adopt a Chinese baby until Pam explains just how much trouble that would be.
Ep 3.20 Jim dresses and behaves exactly like Dwight.
Ep 4.03 While Michael conducts a staff meeting, the staff is transfixed while hoping an animated cube on the television will finally bounce off the corner, exactly the corner, of the screen.
Ep 5.04 Dwight helps Michael practice for the birth of Jan's baby. There is a slippery watermelon involved.
Ep 6.10 Dwight's giving a self-defense demonstration. Jim convinces Dwight to demonstrate on himself.
Ep 7.04 Dwight hires someone to deal with a hornet's nest in the parking lot, and gives worker a choice of weapons.
Ep 7.10 Dwight's working on his "pedidexterity." Jim brings him a cup of hot coffee. You can probably imagine most of the rest.
Ep 8.02 Kevin decides to eliminate all unnecessary words and syllables when speaking.
Ep 8.09 Dwight shifts to a standing desk. He's soon uncomfortable, which of course Jim notices. You can probably imagine most of the rest.
I'll leave you with one last thought about "The Office" ... I dare you to watch the whole series and tell me that Jim -- not Dwight, not even Michael -- wasn't the glue that held the entire show together.
