The last weekend of the regular season is upon us, the AFC playoff picture is set and all but two slots remain to be decided in the NFC. What’s more, almost everyone's fantasy dreams ended last week. So, unless your team already secured a playoff spot, is playing this weekend for a playoff spot or has been out of the playoffs for weeks, then your season is already over. Sure, you'll tell your wife that you still need Sundays to watch the playoffs but you'll just tuck yourself away in your man cave watching tivo'd episodes of "The Voice" wondering what went wrong in Week 8 and why you can't just tell your wife that you love "The Voice," too. Let's face it, the season is over and all you keep asking yourself is "NOW WHAT?" What are we expected to do? Is there truly an answer for the die-hard football nut who only cares about the glory of his hometown gridiron club? Does the mere idea offend you? Like asking you to forget your first love? Do you expect your kids to appreciate how great Johnny Unitas was? Or trying to get your new barber to get the length just the way you've been getting it for the last 25 years? Not possible, right? Of course not. The end of a losing season stings, leaves us confused and with a feeling of abandonment but that doesn't mean we can't move on. Below is a small list of what you can do to distract your mind from the end of the season that "could have been.” - Start brewing your own beer. You don't even have to be good at it; worst-case scenario is you make bad beer that still has an alcohol content of 5 percent. While your taste buds will hate you, your sorrows won’t. - Get out your old high school jersey, suit up your daughter’s boyfriend in full pads and start tackling practice. Four hours should do the trick. - Mark June 6 on your calendar. That's when the CFL starts, but WAIT! I know what you're thinking but it's something. It's that or wait until September for the NFL. At least if you start with Canadian Football, it will feel like a bigger surprise when the NFL starts. - Go to the basement and break out the original Nintendo, fire up some Tecmo Bowl and fire off 2000 straight games of the best football game ever made. - Take up papier mache, build 36 Tom Brady heads and spend the next nine months cracking open a pinata on Sundays. The family loves a party and you get to focus your emptiness on a guy that goes to the playoffs EVERY SINGLE YEAR!!! - Start playing badminton on Sundays. Sorry, I shouldn’t have suggested that. - Put in Rudy. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. - Chili, whiskey and the making of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, any order. - Angry Birds? - Hibernation.
