Clay Millican reflects on loss of son as scholarship given in his name
Clay Millican did the best he could to fight back the tears.
For the NHRA Top Fuel driver, the last eight months have been a challenge to maintain his trademark smile, glass-half-full personality.
Last Friday's announcement of a UNOH scholarship at the NHRA 4-Wide Nationals, in the name of his son Dalton Millican, was a reminder of any parent’s worst nightmare. On Aug. 13, 2015, Dalton was killed in a single-person motorcycle accident.
“My little boy was wide open all the time,” Millican said. “He loved motorsports and loved working on things. It was a constant with him. The only thing he loved more than working on things was motivating people. He always had motivational quotes on his phone. I know he would be excited to know he will help a motivated young person to better themselves.”
The UNOH scholarship will award deserving students $2,500 to apply to their full academic year cost. The yearly scholarship is open to incoming freshman and current students in the program.
Up to two scholarships may be awarded each year based on the yearly income of the scholarship fund.
The announcement falls into place with what Millican and wife Donna have been busy with since Dalton was killed.
The Millicans have spent most of their off-time from the NHRA Mello Yello Drag Racing Series keeping Dalton’s memory alive. One of those tasks has been in joining former rival Doug Herbert and promoting the message of safe teen driving through his BRAKES Foundation.
Ironically, when Herbert lost his sons Jon and James in an automobile accident, it was Millican who made one of the first calls to offer sympathy and support. He admits he didn’t have a clue what to say.
"I don’t think that anybody that hasn’t lost a child can understand what it’s like," admits Millican. "Nobody understands it unless they’ve lost a child. You hear people say all the time that parents aren’t supposed to bury their children but it happens and there is no describing it. I have had a lot of people that have been awesome and coming to tell me that they’re praying for me, I very much appreciate it, but I don’t think that anyone really understands unless they’ve been through it.”
Millican’s emotional situation went well beyond drag racing and reached the NASCAR community where NASCAR legend Bobby Allison, who too lost a son when Davey Allison was killed in a helicopter accident, offered advice.
"You’ve got millions of great memories and only one bad one, so whenever it hits you, dig deep for the good memories," Millican conveyed.
Millican says he will continue to smile though the tears.
"You have to," Millican said. "I know Dalton is happy, and I know that he wants me, Donna and [brother] Cale to be happy. He wouldn’t want me to be sad, he wouldn’t want Donna to be sad. Do we get sad and cry every day? Sometimes, absolutely we do. We’re sad because he’s not with us, but the truth is that he’s happy, and he is here with us, all around us. He’s just not physically here in his body anymore."
"I can say this, from the time he was born; he lived life to the fullest every day."
Millican was reminded of Dalton’s passion for life from all things, a ringer on his son’s cell phone.
"The first night that we slept after Dalton had his accident, we had his possessions that were given back to us, an alarm goes off at 6:25 AM. It woke us both up. It wasn’t my phone, and it wasn’t hers, it was Dalton’s phone."
Dalton had a habit of naming his phone’s alarms.
What was this one named?
“Smile, you’re alive,” Millican said, fighting back tears. "I know that was a message to all of us; I know it was. I’m asked how I smile through it; that’s how. It was his message that we should smile every day."
Millican hopes the UNOH scholarship will make at least two up and coming students in the automotive field smile too.
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Bobby Bennett is the Publisher/Editor of CompetitionPlus.com, a leading independent online drag racing magazine, since 1999. For the latest in dragster news worldwide, visit www.competitionplus.com or follow on Twitter @competitionplus
