Since FoxSportsOhio.com editor Barry McBride is still trying to wrap his head around soccer, he has been peppering me with questions since watching the Crew’s season opener two weeks ago. So for the benefit of Barry and other Crew newcomers in advance of Saturday’s home opener (4 p.m. on Fox Sports Ohio), here are some more soccer questions and answers.
From Barry: So, what's the deal with the scarves?
Soccer is a winter sport in much of the world, so scarves became a standard and popular piece of club apparel. Even though soccer is primarily a summer sport in America, the scarf tradition is ingrained in soccer culture. Thankfully, this has not caught on with American football. With access to official team neck apparel, Browns and Bengals fans would have hung themselves long ago.
From Barry: I saw offsides called a few times, but there weren't any fat guys jumping ahead of someone else. What the...?
Soccer has a very different offside violation than the one where a Cleveland Browns defender rushes across the line of scrimmage before the snap when it’s 3rd-and-5. Instead of a fixed line for a specific play, soccer’s offside line is dynamic and constantly evolving as play progresses.
In a nutshell, an attacker cannot rush behind either of the final two defensive players to receive a pass until after the ball has been kicked. The goalkeeper is almost always one of the two defensive players, so usually the offside line is determined by the last regular defender. An attacker has to be at least even with that last defender when the ball is played. If he gets a head start, he is offside.
Why make him wait? It would have been a breakaway otherwise!
While it can be frustrating to see a potential breakaway snuffed out by an offside flag, one has to consider that the only reason that there was all that vacant space for a breakaway in the first place was because of the offside rule. Defenses pull up to keep forwards away from their goal, which in turn creates space that can be exploited.
Without offside, the game would largely consist of clumps of players hanging out in front of each goal with long kicks from end to end setting off goalmouth scrums. Would more goals be scored? Probably, but they would likely be ugly, mucky goals following one box-to-box Hail Mary after another.
Instead, there is artistry and exhilaration when an intricate passing sequence and perfectly timed run combine to create a breakaway in the vacant space that the offside rule creates. In those moments, you will forget all about the previous flags.
From Barry, via twitter: Why do soccer clocks tick up rather than down? Explain! My brain is hurting.
My response: There are 90 minutes, so why not simply count them? The second half starts at 45:00.
Barry’s response to my response: It seems almost wistful ("Time is passing us by") rather than NFL/NBA/NHL stress ("TIME IS RUNNING OUT!!"). It calms me.
Barry may think he’s calm, but wait until stoppage time in a tight game.
Wait, what’s stoppage time?
Since the clock runs continuously, the referee adds time back onto each half for things like goals, substitutions, real injuries, fake injuries, and general time wasting. The ref keeps the official time and then, near end of the half, signals to the sideline the minimum number of minutes he is adding to the back end. (This can be adjusted upward for further stoppages.)
Isn’t that arbitrary and stupid? Why not just keep the official time on the scoreboard like the other sports do?
I used to feel that way. I figured soccer was just stuck in the rut of an outdated tradition. MLS must have felt that way too, because for the first four seasons, the official clock was kept on the scoreboard. The result was a nightmare.
Soccer is an easy game to destroy. When players know precisely how much official time is left, and also know that the time isn’t going to get added back on, the delay tactics are kicked up another level. Also, soccer is not regimented or confined to a small space, so a dramatic clock countdown usually doesn’t mean as much as it would in our other sports. Rushing toward midfield with three seconds left means nothing. But if it could theoretically be, say, 13 seconds, well then you may think you have a prayer to whip one last ball into the box. Rather than create drama, the official scoreboard clock actually erased it. Clock knowledge emboldened the clock killers and extinguished the flicker of hope in the nearly hopeless.
After seeing MLS try the official scoreboard clock, I now have no doubts that the continuous clock with stoppage time is the better option for this specific sport. MLS agreed, switching back to the world standard in 2000.
From Barry: Why don't these chaps wear helmets to protect their coconuts?
This question was undoubtedly prompted by the skull-on-skull collision between Crew defenders Shaun Francis and Chad Marshall just seconds into the season opener. The unprotected heads would likely make soccer the most appealing destination for Steelers linebacker James Harrison should he ever follow through on his whiny promises to quit the NFL over his fines and suspensions for vicious head-to-head hits.
Despite its preposterous American reputation as a “wussy” sport, soccer is actually an incredibly physical game. The head, in particular, suffers a lot of abuse from the ball, wayward elbows, and forceful collisions with other skulls. In a two-year stretch, former Crew great Brian McBride had both of his cheeks shattered. Reconstructive surgery after each injury left him with three titanium plates on each side of his face. A couple of years later, he suffered an eye fracture.
Amazingly, McBride’s career wasn’t cut short by concussion issues, but several MLS players haven’t been as fortunate. Former Crew midfielder Ross Paule still suffers from the effects of concussions that forced him to retire in 2005. New England Revolution star Taylor Twellman only played two games after the age of 28 due to concussions. MLS Cup champions Alecko Eskandarian, Josh Gros, Brian Namoff, and Jimmy Conrad are among those who have had their careers cut short by concussions. And the scariest part about that early collision in the Crew game was that Chad Marshall’s future was in doubt in 2007 due to multiple concussions. Crew fans still hold their breath each time he absorbs a blow to the head.
As for helmets, there have been various padded head contraptions worn by concussion-prone players, but nothing that has been proven effective. And as we have seen in the NFL, helmets aren’t necessarily the answer. They can increase the aura of invincibility and also be used as a weapon. Just ask Colt McCoy.
From Barry: The Rapids pointed to the Crew goal and deliberately seemed to give the ball up at one point in a display of something called "sportsmanship.” What is this, and why is it on my television?
In soccer, if an opposing player is injured, the team with the ball will frequently kick the ball out of bounds so the injured player can be attended to. Since the opposing team gets the ensuing throw-in, they customarily boot the ball down the field and give possession back to the original team. It’s one of those “code” things, like every sport has. Before you get too repulsed by the display of sportsmanship, just know that the next unsporting jersey tug, free kick obstruction, dive, cleats-up slide tackle, etc, is just moments away.
From Barry: How would you rate the physical conditioning of soccer players vs. other sports? These guys seem like they're in incredible shape. Has MLS ever considered "No Fat Guys" as a slogan?
All sports have their specific demands, so it’s not really apples to apples. But yes, soccer players are physical freaks. Players usually cover 6-9 miles over the course of a game, including over 100 sprints. And it’s not straight line running either, as there are all sorts of sudden tempo changes and zigzags, plus the matter of trying to skillfully manipulate an object with your feet. And that’s not even getting into the abuse your feet, ankles, shins, and calves take from various kicks and tackles. (So it’s concussions at the top, with gashes and bruises at the bottom. Fun!) In terms of physical conditioning, soccer is basically a sadistically long masochistic interval training session.
As for “No Fat Guys,” I doubt that MLS has ever considered such a slogan. Still in its growth phase, the league surely wouldn’t want an ambiguous slogan that could mistakenly deter guys like us from attending matches.
