Mail-it-in Friday: What excites you more? 'Star Wars' or Super Bowl?

Mail-it-in Friday: What excites you more? 'Star Wars' or Super Bowl?

Published Dec. 18, 2015 11:00 a.m. ET

It's finally here!

Not Week 15 of the NFL season, although that's cool, too. No, the day we have all been waiting for has finally arrived. A nerd nirvana. A grand dork-a-palooza. The Mt. Gibraltar of Geekdom.

That's right: "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" has hit theaters in full force! I have my ticket in hand for the 10:30 p.m. showing on opening night and I couldn't be more pumped. I'm practically shaking in my Boba Fett Underoos.

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Anyway, even though I've been a dedicated "Star Wars" acolyte since birth, there's more than enough room in my heart for other interests, like the NFL. And eating. And lying on the couch.

But, as this will be the last edition of Mail-it-in Friday for 2015, I thought it would be fair to ask: What gets you more excited? A new "Star Wars" movie or the Super Bowl?

Let's get to work!

LIGHTSABERS OR FACEMASKS?

Jason,

Oh-ho HO! Loogit this guy! He's got a life!

I bet you have tons of friends and are on the guest list at all the popular clubs. Skinny jeans, planned facial stubble, three different gym memberships, grilled meat for every meal -- the whole nine yards. All the girls want you and all the men want to be you, right?

Well, lemme tell you something, bucko. Sigh, I actually wish I could be you. You're out having a life, while I'm sitting here with my old retainer, three Facebook friends and a single ticket to the greatest movie event of our lifetime in my sweaty palm.

Sigh. But one day, Jason. One day, I will have a life. And when that day comes, I will look down on other people who are having a good time and not bothering anyone.

Southpaw,

Awwww, come on. Don't be sad.

I mean, you're completely right. Your team definitely doesn't have a shot at the Super Bowl.

No, Kirk. I don't like that. But Southpaw, I want you to take heart and stop being so negative! Your running backs are ... well. The team is in good hands under owner Dan . . . well. Your team name and logo definitely isn't . . . well.

Yeah, it's bad. Here, take one of these:

There's nothing wrong with a good cry around the holidays.

Manuel,

Thanks for following the spirit of the question. I don't believe loving "Star Wars" and the NFL are mutually exclusive.

And I reject the stereotypes. Not everyone lined up for a midnight showing is a braces-wearing, pimple-faced schlub. And not everyone with season tickets on the 400 level are Zubaz-sporting, beer-chugging, strip-club frequenting, MRA-whining douchebags.

I am the living example of that. And I'm sure you are too, Manuel.

Anthony,

See, Jason? Anthony was able to express his opinion without maligning the people who think different.

You get a gold star. And a lollipop.

Gardner,

I hear what you're saying, but . . .

What if we could combine them? Since movies about football seem to be all the rage these days, what if some brave Hollywood producer decided to make a film about the many referee blunders of the 2015 NFL season?

Can you see it?

We could call it "Flags of our Grandfathers," and it could star Martin Landau as Walt Anderson.

Let's get on this. Now.

Sal,

Seriously, right?

I've been counting the days until Friday and I rang in each day with the original trilogy: "Star Wars" on Monday, "The Empire Strikes Back" on Tuesday and "Return of the Jedi" on Wednesday.

And what amazed me is that I still pick up on things. Like, did you realize that Han Solo came off as a creeper when he was getting in Princess Leia's personal space in "Empire Strikes Back"?

I always glossed over it while I was growing up, but when Leia was trying to fix something on the Millennium Falcon, here comes Han Grope-o from behind and reaches around her body. Then starts talking about scoundrels and God knows what.

I got a serious Robin Thicke-like "I know you want it" vibe from that. Quite frankly, I was a tad skeeved out.

Maybe he deserved to take a long nap in carbonite for a while to cool his heels. Did you notice he was much more chill in "Return of the Jedi"?

Not a coincidence.

Jeff,

Packers fans can say that about anything. Wedding? Sure, if the Packers aren't playing. Funeral? Sure, if the Packers aren't playing. Basic human cleanliness? Sure, if the Packers aren't playing.

Treat my stab wound? Sure, if the Packers aren't playing . . . you get the idea.

Those Cheeseheads are a dedicated people.

Buryme,

You say immature adults like it's a bad thing. I would completely torch you right now, but I used up all my anger on Jason from earlier.

So, this will have to do:

Screech Diddy,

Tell me about it. I've done everything I can to avoid spoilers before I go and see this movie, yet it seems there are half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herders dedicated to ruining others' fun.

I want this on the ballot in the next election: Life in prison for those who leak movie footage. No parole, either.

Mike,

Indeed! I don't have anything to add, I just loved that you had BB-8 in your response.

Andre,

Unscipted? Hey, you could say that about "The Phantom Menace," amirite? Eh? Eh?

Shutup, monkey. And happy holidays.

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