A Robot's view: Who wants some action?
Thursday huh? Only three more days. It seems like only days ago, I was cursing the TV as Media Day made the Super Bowl even more of a soap opera. Randy Moss is the greatest receiver ever? Ray Lewis loves deer? Alex Smith ... wait, did anybody talk to Alex Smith? I’ll tell you what I didn’t get from media day, BETTING ADVICE! I mean let’s ask some questions that count! “Hey Harbaugh, are you guys going with heads or tails?” Not you, the other Harbaugh. “Hey Colin, you think you’ll run a lot? Specifically in the second quarter?” I mean, did the trainer even get a booth? Because I would really like to know what color Gatorade they were planning on stocking up! These are the kinds of questions that should have been asked. When it comes to Super Bowl Sunday no bet goes untouched. Inevitably, you will be at a Super Bowl party and there will be a box board, straight bets, someone with a bookie trying to get you to go in on the second half over so he can cover his first half loss. People will have side bets, straight up bets, ‘Can I pay you later bets’, I never bet on that bets, ‘I was gonna bet that, bets, and of course, ‘Did I tell you the bet I won in 86?’ Bets, bets, bets! Everyone loves a bet. So what should you bet on this year? Here are some solid picks if you are on the fence. Bets that can’t lose ... which probably will. Who wins the coin toss? 49ers all the way, they’re named after gold miners. Come on guys! Over/Under 2 1/2 minutes for Alicia Keys to sing National Anthem? OVER. It’s the Super Bowl, who isn’t milking that? Will Someone score a safety? YES! This is for purely selfish reasons cause, “We can dance if we want to, you can leave your friends behind ... ” Over/Under on the Harbaugh handshake postgame, 7.5 seconds? OVER! They’re gonna spend 7.5 seconds talking about mom and dad alone. Over/Under How many times will ‘HARBAUGH’ be said during the game, 20.5? OVER! Everything’s bigger at the Bowl! Who will Obama pick to win the Bowl? RAVENS, although if the 49ers win that could be an uncomfortable visit from the champs. What color Gatorade will be dumped on the head coach, Clear/water, orange, yellow, red, green, blue? - This is the easiest one on the board, YELLOW! That’s everyone’s favorite and that’s why it’s going off at 5/2, get on that! What will have a higher TV rating in the Baltimore area, the Super Bowl or the third season of 'The Wire?' I wouldn’t touch this one. Mainly because I made it up. Note: None of this is real advice, unless you believe in robots then it’s 100 percent real and you should bet your kids college fund on it.