The Internet is destroying Ryan Lochte for changing his story about Rio robbery
Ryan. Ryan, Ryan, Ryan ... not like this, man.
In the powder keg of actual pressing issues assailing the 2016 Olympics in Rio de Janeiro, there's no room or time for half-baked stories about crimes that didn't take place.
But new details emerged Thursday night about the robbery allegations levied earlier this week by U.S. swimmers Ryan Lochte, Jack Conger, Gunnar Bentz and James Feigen.
Now, the swimmers' claims about being robbed by Rio police early Sunday morning has been called into question by Brazilian authorities investigating the allegations. Lochte, who returned to America on Wednesday, is already backpedaling on his story, citing stress-induced "traumatic mischaracterization" for how he described the event. Meanwhile, Lochte's teammates Conger and Bentz remain in Rio after being pulled off a plane bound for the United States by Brazilian law enforcement. They have agreed to stay in the country as police gather information.
In short, this thing is quickly devolving into a venti cluster-dump.
And, naturally, Lochte is getting both barrels of the Internet boom-stick after his hasty exit from Brazil this week.
What Ryan Lochte told his momma vs what really happened pic.twitter.com/jyUGT6B5ko
— Jemele Hill (@jemelehill) August 18, 2016
Ryan Lochte leaving Rio when they added his robbery story up pic.twitter.com/6LwQXnSCm3
— Marco Henry Negrete (@marcohenry) August 18, 2016
When Ryan Lochte escapes Brazil but the rest of the swim team is stranded with seized passports pic.twitter.com/diI00r9nNW
— chaps (@UncleChaps) August 18, 2016
Ryan Lochte if he and his boys are ever in a Walking Dead Zombie Apocalypse: pic.twitter.com/CN9UREr8FJ
— Rob Perez (@World_Wide_Wob) August 18, 2016
Just acquired this photo of Ryan Lochte going through security at the Rio de Janeiro airport pic.twitter.com/J8nQulSBm3
— Will Brinson (@WillBrinson) August 18, 2016
Ryan Lochte hearing his teammates got detained in Rio: https://t.co/YD3SVmAT1K
— SportsPickle (@sportspickle) August 18, 2016
"I was there with Ryan Lochte when he got robbed in Rio..." pic.twitter.com/CbDHJQW3JK
— Zito (@_Zeets) August 18, 2016
"Before your flight, Mr Lochte, we just have a few more questions about the, ahem, robbery"
— Tweetgood Mac (@SnottieDrippen) August 18, 2016
"Lemme change my shirt" pic.twitter.com/xqhhjr0aP6
Ryan Lochte and his mom rn in America vs those other two dudes trapped in Brazil pic.twitter.com/uyN4yw1t9j
— KFC (@KFCBarstool) August 18, 2016
Ryan Lochte's life is a never-ending series of car related mishaps. pic.twitter.com/fDdvgjXYoK
— Arkansas Fred (@ArkansasFred) August 17, 2016
These are good jokes, and much deserved. But once we're done howling at what could be the dumbest made-up wild night story of 2016 -- Lochte and company could be in, like, real trouble.
It's too early in the information gathering process for conjecture, but falsifying a robbery -- if that turns out to be what this is -- isn't something police tend to take lightly.
Dan is on Twitter. Ryan Lochte: hero to a nation, now a man of no country on the run from his past.
