Open mic: Tiger has the wrong answers to the wrong questions
“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” – Albert Einstein
Well, Albert, I’m afraid you’re right again.
You see, I just watched all of Tiger Woods’ Tuesday press conference from the British Open at St. Andrews. And just like every other press conference featuring the former greatest golfer in the world, it was dull and uninformative at its best and delusional at its worst. I don’t really know why I expected anything different. Maybe I’ve gone insane like Dr. Einstein said. But, on a positive note, I now have a new sleep aid. I’m just gonna put it on a loop tonight and it’ll be quickly off to dreamland.
It’s not all Tiger’s fault that his interviews are so boring. Let me give you a few examples of the questions he was asked.
“What’s the trick to lag putting?”
“Do you have good memories from winning at St. Andrews in 2000 and 2005?”
“What advice would you give to Jordan Spieth and Rory McIlroy?”
What the hell? Professional journalists asked this stuff? Does anyone really want to know the answers? I think not. Allow me to pose a few more interesting questions. Oh, and dear members of the press, feel free to steal these and use them as your own. I’m doing this for your benefit.
“You say you’re changing your swing. What was wrong with the last 25 swings you tried out?”
“How are the glutes this week? Feeling activated? And please tell us mortals exactly what that means.”
“How are you and Chris Como addressing your inability to hit a drive anywhere near the actual golf course on which you’re playing?”
“If a chipping change causes you to chili-dip half your chips, why stick with it?”
Now those would make for a press conference that I’d want to watch! But I won’t hold my breath.
I know I said it’s not all Tiger’s fault these press sessions are so boring, but he certainly doesn’t help. He was asked how different he feels going into this major compared to the last few, where his injuries were more of a factor.
This is a direct quote:
“. . . I was able to turn things around. I had a chance to win at the Masters this year. And we made another shift [in his swing, I presume] at Memorial, and it worked out perfectly. I hit the ball great at Greenbriar.”
Huh? I couldn’t believe the reporters on hand didn’t erupt in laughter. Maybe he forgot he finished T17 at the Masters, 13 shots behind Jordan Spieth. And in Tiger’s mind, is the 85 he shot at Murfield Village or the opening-round 80 he shot at the U.S. Open really a sign of a swing change working out perfectly? The obvious answer is no, but until the day he retires he just can’t allow himself to think any differently.
Sports psychologists are in agreement that anyone great should never admit he doesn’t have the ability to be great anymore. Until the day you retire, you should always be convincing yourself you’re the best. It’s like when Evander Holyfield kept saying he could be the heavyweight champion again 10 years past his prime, or when Donald Trump says his hair looks great.
But here’s where those psychologists have it wrong: You can lie to everyone else, but you can’t lie to yourself. Holyfield knew deep down that he wasn’t going to be considered for a title shot. Trump knows when he looks in the mirror that his hair looks like a nest made by a blind ostrich with one leg. And in his heart of hearts Woods knows he’s nowhere near the form that took him to the top of the golf world. That’s the real reason why a Tiger Woods press conference isn’t worth listening to. Until he is done with golf, he just won’t be able to openly admit how he feels about his game.
I sincerely hope as a huge fan of Woods’ golf game that we see him on the leaderboard this Sunday. Maybe, just maybe, he did find something in the final round at Greenbriar that will turn his game around. Or maybe, like Dr. Einstein said, I’ll just go nuts from listening to the same Tiger Woods hype over and over and expecting a different result.
I really hope he plays great because I don’t want to watch Tiger’s press conference at next month’s PGA Championship while wearing a straight jacket.
Former PGA Tour pro Robert Damron is a regular contributor to FOXSports.com's golf coverage. Follow him on Twitter @RobertDDamron.
