"Everyone thinks they have the prettiest wife at home..."
Does anyone remember that quote and whom it was attributed to?
During the 2002 season, as Arsenal completed the league and cup double, Arsene Wenger and Sir Alex Ferguson were in the midst of a classic verbal feud - the Frenchman won that war of words with ease.
Eight years later these two great managers still spar but it has become an increasingly one-sided affair. In fact, Sir Alex no longer needs to joust with words, he just sends out his best eleven and they do the talking for him on the pitch. Game, set and match.
The ever thoughtful, studious, Wenger must be wondering what on earth has happened. His was the team that was supposed to dominate English football for the rest of time. His was the team that played the real football that had the purists drooling.
Instead, the harsh realities of the modern game have caught up with him, almost rendering him a bumbling nutty professor instead of the Einstein he craves to be.
Wenger has always prided himself on playing with the big boys but over the last six seasons we’ve seen that his Gunners are running onto the pitch wearing short shorts instead of trousers in the matches that really matter.
United and the other big boy on the block, Chelsea, have their number. It is as plain as day and the facts don’t lie. If you don’t believe me, don’t read on because I’m going to burst your bubble.
Since the double season of 2002, Arsenal have faced Man United 25 times, with United taking 12 wins, Arsenal five and eight draws making up the balance.
Since the 2004 UEFA Champions League 2nd leg encounter at Highbury, Arsenal have played Chelsea 15 times with Cheslea racking up nine wins, Arsenal with two wins and four draws making up the balance.
It doesn’t make for pretty reading does it?
What it does highlight, though, is a defensive frailty that Wenger has yet to truly address. It’s all well and good creating the most dizzying attacking patterns world football has ever seen, but it means nothing when you’re losing matches through poor defending.
On Sunday at the Emirates, you could honestly say with hand on heart that each of United’s three goals was defendable, except they weren’t. Wenger called it naiveté. I call it not being good enough.
Let’s look at some other numbers, namely Premier League experience. Starts are in parentheses; Manuel Almunia (92), Thomas Vermaelen (25), Gael Clichy (123), Bakari Sagna (85), William Gallas (247). I don’t have to be Einstein to calculate 572 matches equals, in my books, experience not naiveté.
What we have here is a side that has playing experience but not winning experience. Despite all the minor victories, of which there are many, Arsenal doesn’t know how to win the ‘big one,’ of which there are few. This is a club that is apprehensive before it even takes the field. They’ve already lost the match in the most important place where football is played - their minds.
Think back to Sunday - when the early chances to change the game didn’t go in, what happened? Heads dropped and they didn’t play Arsenal football until they were three-nil down. Why?
The answer is simple: the match was lost, the pressure was off and they were free to express themselves.
So the question for Wenger and the Emirates faithful must be the following:
‘When will we have the required experience and bottle to win these matches?’
The answer, and it pains me to say it, is never.
Despite the mesmerizing brilliance of their football, Arsenal lacks the defining requirement to reign supreme in English football - character.
Don’t get me wrong, Cesc Fabregas has more character in his little pinky than entire teams but it's not enough at the very top - he needs help. Wenger’s reticence in the transfer market, whether it’s because his hands are tied or lack of belief in his own transfer acumen is hurting the club.
He no longer has the time to develop the finished article, he must buy and in football circles it is no secret what he needs. Unfortunately for the Professor, it is an entire spine.
Goalkeeper. Center-half. Center midfield and striker.
Even to someone who is bad with numbers, that feels like a $150 million dollar minimum investment and Arsenal are simply not in that market, in fact they’re not even in that universe.
At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter who has the prettiest wife. What matters is that she’s at home polishing up the groaning trophy cabinet. Sir Alex Ferguson’s wife has a full time job.
Until then, I’ll see you at the far post.
Nick Webster is a senior soccer writer for FoxSoccer.com.
