Mail thief targets ex-UFC fighter Keith Jardine’s house. Whoops.

Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet, nor hail shall keep 'The Dean Of Mean" from tracking your mark-ass down.

Tom Kelley/Getty Images

There’s a World’s Dumbest Criminals show in this mail thief’s future.

It’s bad enough that his racket is stealing people’s mail (c’mon, man). But this guy made the grave mistake of trying to do it to someone who was once called “The Dean of Mean.”

Richard Davenport allegedly rolled up on Keith Jardine’s house, opened up his mailbox and jacked the ex-UFC fighter’s letters, according to KRQE in Albuquerque.

We can only guess what might have been in there. Lotion for cauliflowered ears? A late-arriving holiday card from Scott Coker? A request to be in Bellator’s next 205-pound tournament?

“I look out the window and I see a car pulling up,” Jardine said. “Some guy gets out, goes to my mailbox and grabs all my mail, throws it in his car and speeds off.”

So, Jardine ran out of his Albuquerque home and engaged the man in a high-speed car chase. In other words, Keith Jardine is bored and misses the adrenaline rush of fighting in a cage for a living.

“I drive up right next to him and I point at him and he speeds off,” Jardine said. “Then I speed past him and I slammed my Bronco right in front of him and I cut him off.”

Jardine said he reached back like he was going to hit the guy, but Davenport begged off.

“I pulled him out of the car,” Jardine said.

Keith Jardine. Vigilante.

I pulled him out of the car.

--Keith Jardine

Jardine once beat Chuck Liddell and now he’s tangling with some middle-aged dork in New Mexico.

Jardine saw his mail sitting right on Davenport’s passenger seat, but the alleged thief claimed he was just picking up mail for a friend. Sure, bro. Apparently, Jardine wasn’t the only victim either.

“Then the cops told me there was a lot of mail in the backseat,” said Jardine, who last fought in July 2012 for Strikeforce.

KRQE reports that hard-ass law enforcement unit, the U.S. Postal Service, is investigating the case. But Jardine definitely still wants a piece of the guy.

“The most cowardly thing you can do is steal from somebody,” Jardine said.

Right. Kind of like when the judges stole that win from Gegard Mousasi against you three years ago, Keith.