Barry Zito! Coming soon to a ... something near you?

BY foxsports • December 10, 2014

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San Diego - As you know, there's nobody better than Scott Boras at what Scott Boras does.

And he does two things!

Fortunately for his clients, he's a tremendous salesman. Prince Fielder's got a $214 million contract, which is probably all that needs to be said about that.

Fortunately for us, he's a tremendous bullshitter. Of course this doesn't enhance our understanding of our favorite game, but it does serve as a welcome distraction from all the world's ills.

Every year at the Winter Meetings, Boras shows up one afternoon and takes questions from a throng of reporters, and he always comes up with a few gems. Here's one of 2014's best:

And then there's this precious gem:

He also compared Max Scherzer, one of the five best starting pitchers in baseball today, to Peyton Manning, maybe one of the five best quarterbacks in NFL history. But, whatever. I like those other two quotes better. You have appreciate someone who can obliquely, almost elegantly accuse grown men of peeing in the swimming pool. I mean, peeing a lot. And the notion that widespread interest in Barry Zito means anything other than teams in Korea and Italy accepting Boras's phone calls ... well, the world is a better place when Scott Boras is talking. We need the laughter, in perfect harmony.

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