Give people a forum to speak their mind in 140 characters or less and you have provocative, diverse and controversial thoughts on the Internet. Give a sports celebrity the same forum, and you have this.
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From Cincinnati Bengals’ Chad Ochocinco (@OGOchoCinco), four mind-boggling tweets:
-Forget switching phones let’s switch numbers,everybody post their phone number on twitter for 1minute exactly then erase
-Oh yeah that really is my number, ask the blogs, don’t call just text, see im normal just like you, I’m accessible 513-235-8585
-people are so dumb, i answer the phone and they ask, is this Chad, WTF i just gave you the number on twitter duh!!!!
Yep, people sure can be dumb.
From Phoenix Coyotes’ Paul Bissonnette (@BizNasty2point0): Not in the line up tonight folks. U can give ur tickets away and do something else now lol.
The Coyotes’ management appreciates your support.
From Michigan Wolverines’ Troy Woolfolk (Twoolf29): Just had to "google image" myself to stop them from taking me to jail cause I got pulled over and didn’t have my license.
Ann Arbor, Michigan > Gainesville, Florida?
From Carolina Panthers’ Jimmy Clausen (@JimmyClausen): Making a great meal at the apt if anyone wants to join, thanks to Terry Lee…steam brown rice and asian ribs!!
What are the odds of some stranger knocking on Jimmy’s door, Jimmy letting him in and actually serving him dinner? A million to one?
From golfer Paula Creamer (@PCreamer): Sooo angry I dropped my favorite nail polish in the world and broke it! And of course you can’t find it anywhere! Mad-hatters by OPI. So mad
Translation: OK OPI, here’s your free endorsement, now send me a lifetime supply of Mad-hatters.
From Boston Celtics’ Shaquille O’Neal (@The_Real_Shaq): First day is over, the truth and ray allen didn’t miss a shot, daaayum I wish I was a shooter Lol
We’d take you hitting over 50 percent at the free throw line, but that probably isn’t on your wish list either.
From New Orleans’ Saints’ Darren Sharper (@sharper42), a series of tweets:
-If you have a bunch of salad bowls in your cuppard and all them say cool whip on the sides….you might be a red neck.
-If you think fast food is hitting a deer at 70mph…..you might be a red neck..
-If you ever worn a tank top to a funeral….you might be a red neck.
-If you think a 401k is your grandmothers bra size….you might be a red neck.
We predict a series of Chuck Norris facts from Mr. Sharper in about 8 years.
From St. Louis Rams’ Steven Jackson (@sj39): Day starting to come to an end. The groin is making good progress.
Doesn’t the day start to come to an end as soon as the day starts?
From Ryder Cup golfer Paul Azinger (@PaulAzinger): At airport in Newark. Last American meal before heading across the pond to Wales. Will it be taste buds beware or culinary delights?
We’re betting the food in Wales is slightly better than the American food at Newark Airport.
From golfer Kyle Walters (@KyleWaltersGolf): Why do i always end up spending $10 at the $5 place…urgh (@ Subway)
Maybe try the "club" sandwich next time?
From Green Bay Packers’ Nick Barnett (@Nick Barnett): Would have loved to go undefeated but last time I check, the last team that did that did not win the super bowl…
Is that why Tom Brady is sporting those flowing goldilocks??????
From UFL’s Sacramento Mountain Lions’ Darrell Strong (@DarrellStrong82): Ohhhh maannnn I think I might go get a MacBook Pro or a LV [Louis Vuitton]duffle bag today which one. I need help
In other words, you feel like spending some dough on Overstock.com?
From Oakland Raiders’ Quentin Groves (@QuentinGroves52): Do any of you have a fetish?? If so what??
Why are we opening this can of worms? On the Internet, no less?
From Cincinnati Bengals’ Quantwan Cosby (@Cosby12): Pink panther may have the smoothest pimp walk in the game…
Agreed! Forget the "dougie," do this instead.
From Tennessee Volunteers’ Tauren Poole (@TPoole706): I think every human being on earth has split personalities.
Just imagine if the census had to count them too.
From Purdue Boilermakers’ Ryan Kerrigan (@Ryan Kerrigan94): Skip Bayless just ranked Ben Roethlisberger the fifth best quarterback through 3 games..funny, I couldve sworn he hadn’t played in any yet
From Chicago Bears’ Chris Harris (@ChrisHarrisNFL), two tweets:
I Hate random drug test on off days. Headed to Halas Hall.
[When asked if he passed the test]: With flying colors. I aced it
Just how does one "ace" a drug test? This is pass or fail.
From NASCAR spotter Brett Griffin (@19spotter): That blonde can dance her Ass off!! Glee.
Oh Brett, never, ever publicly admit you watch a show that Justin Bieber-type fans love to talk about on twitter.
From Miami Dolphins’ Ricky Williams (@Ricky Williams): Speaking of concussions….I am very thankful for my Xenith helmet. I really like it. I notice a difference.
Laying off that hippie lettuce also might be a reason why your head seems more comfortable.
From St. Louis Rams’ Steven Jackson (@sj39): When I eat Chinese food with chop sticks, I never get full. It’s hard work. Lol