Ladies and gentlemen, casual gamblers and degenerates, fantasy players and daily bettors: it has been an honor sweating lines with you this NFL season. Before we get too misty-eyed, though, there are 16 regular season games left to wager on this year — and we're expecting a wild Week 17.
After a 9-7 showing last week, we're 125-107-7 on the year. Here are your final lines, picks and over/unders for the 2016 regular season, but don't fear. We'll still be making picks throughout the playoffs.
(Lines courtesy of the Westgate Las Vegas SuperBook as of 12/29. Pick listed first, with home team in all caps.)
COLTS (-4.5) over Jaguars (Over/under: 47)
Week 17 is always a ridiculous time for betting on the NFL, and this year will be no exception. Here are the two rules to keep in mind:
1.) Bet on the better quarterback.
2.) When in doubt, particularly as it pertains to whether starters will play or how invested a team is in the game, take the points.
Rule No. 1 rules the day in Indianapolis.
Kirby LeeKirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports
Panthers (+6) over BUCCANEERS (Over/under: 46.5)
The Bucs have a ridiculously convoluted path to the playoffs that depends on basically every NFC team on the bubble losing, plus a tie between New York and Washington ...
... or Tampa Bay could make it easy on everyone and come up short against Carolina.
Bears (+5) over VIKINGS (Over/under: 41)
The forecast in Minnesota: field goals, and lots of them. I'm counting on a three-point margin, one way or the other.
MCTTNS via Getty Images
Browns (+6) over STEELERS (Over/under: 43.5)
The Steelers reportedly will rest most of their key players. I don't think that's enough to give Cleveland a second win on the season, but the lack of Ben Roethlisberger & Co. should keep the Browns in the game.
Joe RobbinsGetty Images
JETS (+3.5) over Bills (Over/under: 42)
Now, I know what you're thinking. Isn't betting on Ryan Fitzpatrick a violation of Rule No. 1 from above?
The answer: not when the Bills are benching Tyrod Taylor for E.J. Manuel. Jets-Bills is a clear "Rule No. 2" contest, so we'll take the points.
Getty Images for New York JetsAl Pereira
Cowboys (+4) over EAGLES (Over/under: 43)
Unlike several other Super Bowl contenders, all signs are that Dallas will play its starters against Philadelphia. Someone apparently forgot to tell Las Vegas, though.
Tim HeitmanTim Heitman-USA TODAY Sports
TITANS (-3) over Texans (Over/under: 40)
Even with Matt Cassel under center instead of the injured Marcus Mariota, Tennessee's run game should be enough to get the Titans a win over the Texans and QB Tom Savage.
Patriots (-9.5) over DOLPHINS (Over/under: 44.5)
Both teams have something to play for — the 1 seed for New England and a shot at the 5 seed for Miami — which theoretically should make for a competitive game. On the other hand, the Patriots already beat the Dolphins by a TD earlier this season, and that was without Tom Brady.
Ravens (+2.5) over BENGALS (Over/under: 41.5)
Sunday could be the end of the Marvin Lewis era in Cincinnati, and a home loss to a division foe would be a (sadly) fitting end to his tenure with the Bengals.
Eric Hartline-USA TODAY SportsEric Hartline
Cardinals (-6) over RAMS (Over/under: 40.5)
Arizona's fall out of the playoff race has obscured Carson Palmer's slight resurgence over the past few weeks. Against a Los Angeles team with little to play for, Palmer should continue his recent run.
Rob Foldy-USA TODAY SportsRob Foldy
Chiefs (-6) over CHARGERS (Over/under: 44.5)
The Chiefs are counting on an Oakland loss (and a win of their own over San Diego) to claim the No. 2 seed in the AFC. With San Diego playing out the string, Kansas City should cruise to an easy victory to cap a strong regular season.
FALCONS (-6.5) over Saints (Over/under: 56.5)
The Falcons lock up the No. 2 seed with a win, while New Orleans doesn't have much reason to keep things interesting in Atlanta. A seven-point victory for the Falcons seems like a pretty safe bet.
Giants (+7.5) over REDSKINS (Over/under: 44)
Eli Manning says he's looking to come out and stay in rhythm despite the fact that New York's locked in as the No. 5 seed already. That focus probably won't spell a win, but the Giants will make Washington sweat in its quest to make it into the playoffs.
Bill StreicherBill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports
Seahawks (-9.5) over 49ERS (Over/under: 43)
A two-touchdown Seattle win will give the Seahawks some necessary momentum headed into the playoffs — and give the 49ers some big questions about Chip Kelly's future in San Francisco.
BRONCOS (-1) over Raiders (Over/under: 40)
With both offenses such wild cards, I'm putting my faith in the team with a solid defense in Denver on Sunday.
I'm also steeling myself against the possibility that this pick backfires in a big way. Such is the risk with a one-point favorite.
Ron Chenoy-USA TODAY SportsRon Chenoy
Packers (-3.5) over LIONS (Over/under: 49.5)
Detroit's record regresses to its overall performance with one more loss to wrap up the 2016 NFL season, as Aaron Rodgers proves to be prescient with his belief that the Packers would win out.