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DIME SMACK: Gatling high on Cavs love

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It's official. has lost his mind. Read this doozy he dropped about the Cleveland Cavs, the team he's currently hoping to re-sign with: "The way Wes [Person] played last year and if [Clarence] Weatherspoon and I were still there, who knows what could've happened. We would've been a playoff team." There's a jaded sense of self if we ever saw one. Today marks the first of 20 days that certified NCAA coaches can go on the road to recruit, just in time for the biggest individual high school showcases of the year: adidas ABCD Camp and . Of the 324 D-I programs, 56 schools were not certified as of the beginning of the weekend, including Duke, Kansas and Pittsburgh. But we wouldn't go betting our last dime that Coach K and Roy Williams will be sitting at home this afternoon on their keester, just channel surfing. We figure them to be more of the poker-playing type. We thought Brian Morrison transferred from UNC to get away from competition with younger point guards, but then he goes and signs on with UCLA, as a walk-on no less. If Morrison didn't want splinters watching Raymond Felton ball on Tobacco Road, why would he head to Westwood to go pine-riding behind Cedric "The Entertainer" Bozeman? There are plenty of top-notch schools who could have better utilized his abilities.

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Rather quietly, the Global Games have been rolling along in Dallas with the U.S. Team playing very well in their first two contests, thanks to incoming college freshmen like Chris Bosh and Daniel Horton. The gold-medal game is Tuesday and figures to be quite a show. China spanked Australia's national team 84-70, thanks to Yao Ming's post presence. The big guy caused the trio of Aussie giants, including former NBA baller Chris Antsey, to foul out. Now if he can do the same to Shaq, the should be set for liftoff. Poland's (yes Poland) Cezary Trybanski had some recognizable names at his recent invitation-only workout in Cleveland. The 7'0" center free agent slipped through the draft but now the ' Scott Layden and the Wolves' Kevin McHale are eyeing him like hawks. A few unnamed teams have already asked him for an encore performance. From the We Are Not Making This Up department: Jimmy Jackson got married to entertainment manager Shawnee Simms this past weekend in front of 500 guests, including , and . That's all fine and dandy until you hear that Mike Tyson gave away the bride as Boyz II Men serenaded the couple. Then Tyrese performed at the reception. Nothing against Iron Mike, but we wouldn't let him come within 500 yards of a wedding, much less let him walk down the aisle with the bride. From the We Are Not Making This Up department, Part 2: According to Ted Williams' estranged daughter, the Hall of Famer's son has frozen Williams' body in hopes of a future revival instead of being cremated as Teddy Ballgame had wished. It set back the son 50 G's to freeze his old man but he figures it would be worth it since he apparently suggested to Williams' daughter once, "We could sell Daddy's DNA." We're not about to touch this one but do want to say Williams was a great man and will be forever missed. We're out like Gatling's mind.
Tagged: Rockets, 76ers, Dikembe Mutombo

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