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Fantasy Football Week 5 Waiver Wire
So, this pumpkin walks into a bar.
No, it’s not Barry Love’s latest one-liner at the Chuckle Hut, but rather one of my favorite food marketing slogans of all-time.
The this pumpkin walks into a bar are actually a line of cereal bars sold at Trader Joe’s grocery stores.
If you’re like me (I'm sorry), you arrive at a supermarket with the goal of returning home with enough food to last you the week ahead. Instead, in typical guy fashion, I unload my grocery bags only to find a "Rat Pack" of condiments, a loaf of bread, no lunch meat, ice cream, a bag of chips, box of cereal, hot dog (no buns), and milk.
It’s a mess.
However, I learned that Trader Joe’s is the Cliffs Notes version of your typical grocery store. It’s perfect for dudes with horrible supermarket shopping skills. First, it’s only five aisles wide, with an aisle-and-a-half dedicated to microbrews and wine. Yeah. Second, they limit the amount of junk food and condiments stocked on store shelves. Third, and most importantly, you leave with Frank Ricard-approved WHOLE meals of food (see clip below). I’ve returned home with teriyaki chicken strips, burritos, sushi, ravioli, fish and salad wraps. The condiment army in my fridge now has roommates.
A month into the fantasy football season, fellow owners are looking to vulture your Trader Joe’s porterhouse in exchange for a bottle of steak sauce.
You’ll receive your Reggie Wayne, Daryl Richardson and Martellus Bennett for Adrian Peterson trade offers. In Weeks 1, 2 and 3, I was offered Greg Olsen and Bilal Powell, before Chris Ivory injured his hamstring, for Rob Gronkowski. He was persistant on the verge of insulting.
You can slap lipstick on a pig, but it’s still ugly and I crave the bacon, not the gristle and greased-up paper towel you’re offering. Do NOT sell yourself short in fantasy transactions.
Owners will also face BYE weeks the next two months. We need those bench-warming bags o’ chips to play like filet get’some.
The remaining crumbs are picked over on the waiver wire, but as we’ve learned in the past, free-agent pumpkins can walk into your starting lineup and be your best fantasy assett - bar none.
Fantasy Football Week 5 Waiver Wire Targets
Rashad Jennings – Raiders Running back
Ownership: 2.0 percent
Analysis: With Darren McFadden (hamstring) and Marcel Reece (knee) without a timetable to return, Jennings is in a great position to shine in Week 5 against the Chargers. San Diego is 25th against the rush. Jennings will have more value in PPR leagues after catching eight balls for 71 yards (led team) last week against the Redskins.
Danny Woodhead – Chargers Running Back
Ownership: 17.2 percent
Analysis: Woodhead made a name for himself within the Patriots’ system the last few seasons. Some critics suggested his fantasy production was because of that system. Well, due to Ryan Mathews inability to secure the first-string running back gig in San Diego, Woodhead has started to cut into his touches and targets.
Without question, the scrappy halfback will be the most-added fantasy player in PPR leagues this week after posting 30-plus rushing yards, an average of six receptions and 50-plus receiving yards in back-to-back games. The two receiving touchdowns against the Cowboys was the third time Woodhead scored twice in the same game.
Nate Washington – Titans Wide Receiver
Ownership: 15.9 percent
Analysis: With Kenny Britt’s future uncertain and Jake Locker out the next few weeks with a hip injury, the Titans will rely on some veterans to get them over the hump. In his ninth season out of Tiffin (OH), Washington continues to quietly produce fantasy numbers. Over the last two games, he’s caught 12 passes on 18 targets for 236 yards with two touchdowns. Washington is a strong BYE week replacement and/or WR3 in fantasy leagues moving forward
Robert Woods – Bills Wide Receiver
Ownership: 3.4 percent
Analysis: It’s the second time Woods has appeared in my weekly waiver wire feature. Now, the targets are starting to come for the former USC receiver. Over his last three games, the rookie has been targeted an average of eight times per contest. He’s racked up 183 yards with a touchdown during that stretch.
Tennessee Titans Defense / Special Teams
Ownership: 27.1 percent
Analysis: The Titans DST are averaging just over 14 fantasy points per game this season. They are 10th in the NFL with five interceptions (one TD), fifth in fumble recoveries with four (one TD) and third in sacks with 14.
Five more waiver wire options:
• Justin Blackmon
• Pierre Thomas
• Keenan Allen
• Heath Miller
• Coby Fleener
As always, waiver wire targets vary from team-to-team, league-to-league. If I can help you, let me know on Twitter @FOXSportsFowler.