The Best Alabama Fan Photo of the Year
Let's dive in with our 11 favorite things about this newborn Bama fan photo:
1. Someone actually thought, you know what would be great, if we put a hand gun on our newborn's chest and took a picture of him in Alabama gear.
This. Actually. Happened.
2. The baby appears to be sleeping on the same camo sling that was used to evacuate his great-uncle Earl from Vietnam in 1968.
Uncle Earl intentionally shot himself, but has been blaming the Vietcong for the past forty years.
Don't believe me?
Just try to get him to buy a Hyundai.
3. The Bama fan will say, "It was unloaded, chill out."
Which is exactly what Bama fans all say right before they accidentally shoot each other.
4. Odds this photograph is being introduced as part of a sentencing hearing in 18 years?
5. The Bama mom saw this photo being taken and she screamed, "Wait!"
Then she adjusted the photo so that the rifle was also visible above the baby's head.
6. The previous Facebook post from this guy?
Liking a Sarah Palin comment about "Duck Dynasty."
7. Harvey Updyke saw this photo and said, "Y'all be reasonable."
"Just show some sense. Have a little class," Updyke said.
8. What if this baby grew up gay?
I'm sure his dad would take it well, right?
Actually, it will be the dad's fault. Everybody knows that gay babies pose with handguns. Heterosexual sleeping babies pose with AK-47's.
9. Instead of arguing that he's under "special pressure," Nick Saban is just faxing this picture to Jimmy Sexton.
Saban's wife is going to log on to Outkick, see this picture, and pack her bags for Texas.
10. If the Baby Jesus had been born in an Alabama manger, he would have shot the wise men.
After accusing them of being Auburn fans.
11. Inevitably some Bama fans will argue this is photoshopped.
I say that's impossible.
Because no one else would even think to photoshop this because it's so unbelievable.
Who sees a picture of a baby sleeping with a gun on his chest and thinks, "You know what will make this picture even more ridiculous? Make him a Bama fan."
Only Bama fans would even think to take this picture.
Update: the picture is even more ridiculous than we first thought:
The Bama bagy is actually posing with a handgun surrounded by six rifles and a pink handgun.